[this post has been updated by the editor to include some additional notes for clarification - all additions have been placed in brackets like this]

Kelly McWilliams (Weddings by Socialites) just did an excellent post on this topic and I have been wanting to throw in my 2 cents since I read it!  Here is a link to Kelly’s post if you have not seen it.

Brides, do your research.   We have seen several lists from bridal salons, venues, and other businesses that have companies that “pay” to be part of the vendors list [we are not talking about paid advertising sites, brochures, or traditional marketing avenues].  While this may be a good tool to get you started [and/or to increase your frequency of name recognition], it should not be used exclusively.  We personally do not believe in paying to be part of vendor lists,  since we believe in being listed based on merit, quality of work, and professionalism, among other things! [AMC does however subscribe to certain websites, paid for advertising directories, etc.)

AMC has been fortunate and extremely grateful to be listed as a preferred vendor at many of the resorts at Sanibel, Captivia, Fort Myers, and Naples.  When you start seeing the same name pop up everywhere, that is a good sign [but not the only one].

So our advice to brides [hasn't changed even this post has been updated] – Please, Do your homework!  Take the time to see your vendors, your banquet managers, and your coordinators. Meet them, see their work, and establish your goals one-on-one with each other. Establishing this type of relationship will pay off for all parties involved in a multitude of ways.

[Our second message here, with much humility, is that we feel that paying to be on a list dismantles the whole point of referring those your trust to do the right thing, to represent the venue as it wants to be represented to the customer, and it no longer bases the quality of service or product on merit.  It dissolves the whole value of a strong strategic alliance between venue and vendor.  For that reason, we urge customers to do their homework because ultimately it seems to cross the line when someone is paying to be referred vs. when someone is represented or referred based on merit, trust, and reliability.

Many of the area banquet managers know that we (AMC) tries to look at things from a venues point of view - esp since we know that venues have their fair share of thankless hassles to deal with as well, including vendor politics! So hear us when we say that we are grateful and consider it a privilege to be listed with you!  Those referals mean the world to our business and the intent is to preserve and protect a strong relationship at all times.

We also consider it a responsibility to share and work with the venues - to make it a win-win for those involved starting with the customer!  Ultimately we want to voice a message that those relationships that have been formed (between us as preferred vendor), really should be honored and works well when founded on those priciples of working together toward a common goal, implict trust, treating the customer with first prioroty, etc.!  However, the politics, the payments, and the rest - well that seems to really cloud the point of our jobs, doesn't it?]